Caityquilter.com » Health

11 & 12 of 365, a journal page, and what I’m reading

Caitlin — Wed, 16 Sep 2009 05:43:25 +0000

Loved

Stairs

I didn’t forget to take my 365 self portrait yesterday – I just didn’t have my computer. It had been getting a wee bit unstable, as these things do, so it was time to save all the data and do a “nuke & pave” – wipe the whole box clean and install a whole new Operating System. I must say, I LOVE LINUX MINT!! Super easy to manage, (I did the install by myself! Try doing THAT with a w1nd0ws OS!) and the price is awesome (FREE!). My computer is now back up to date and running faster – I just have to make time to trawl through all the backed up files and see what REALLY needs keeping.

And I’m very gradually learning how to do more things in GIMP – all the layers and brush tools and so on like ph0t0sh0p, but again – FREE!! We love that price!

Today I had a lovely shopping morning with BFF Sue – I only bought a couple of very necessary T-shirts, booooooorrrring! Oh, and a small pressie that I have to mail off tomorrow for a friend in Oregon. (Tee hee! I will show what it is once she has hers – it was so cute I had to buy one for myself, too!)

Off to the gastroenterologist this arvo. *shudder* Hope she can at least point me in the direction of some answers – I’m really tired of stomach/abdominal pain. Ugh.

Open the door and come in

[clicky biggy, obviously]

And finally for this post – a book recommendation. I’m a hyuuuuuuuuuge fan of Elizabeth Peter’s Amelia Peabody mysteries, but she’s getting on (both Elizabeth and Amelia!) and I dread there being no more new books. So I was delighted to read a new (to me) archaeological/mystery heroine – not the same as Amelia, no one ever could be, but quirky, completely in her time period ( I have been known to throw books at the wall for the sin of anachronism) and with delightful detail. Barbara Cleverly is possibly my favourite new find this year! I stayed up finishing the first book (Tomb Of Zeus) last night and started the second over breakfast this morning. I’m hoping this will be the start of a looooong series of Laetitia Talbot books!

(Barbara Cleverly also writes the Detective Joe Sandilands series, but I haven’t read any of those yet.)

Right, that’s about it from me, gotta go find where I’ve put the papers I need to take with me to the specialist…

Ugh. So tired.

Caitlin — Thu, 10 Sep 2009 12:15:12 +0000

I had zero zip nada energy today. In fact, at one point Mr Beloved brought me in a cuppa and a bikkie in the hope it would wake me up. I woke up several hours later with a cold cuppa on the table beside me and a shortbread with one bite taken out of it in my hand…

THIS IS NOT NORMAL!!

Almost a Bad Thing

Caitlin — Wed, 29 Jul 2009 22:16:52 +0000

In a flu-dazed moment the other night…

[clicky for biggy, do I have to keep saying this?]

Luckily once I’d got the top off I realised the tube I had in my hand was TOO BIG to be the lip balm.

Am I the only one to have these sort of near misses? (Anyone? Bueller? Bueller?…)

I am getting better, slowly. Yet again the solar hot water installer declined to come near the obviously germ-ridden House of the Beloveds. Grumph. Next week, we hope. I had to cancel another specialist appointment because I didn’t want to sit about in a waiting room full of people even more vulnerable to this wretched flu than I was.

Time for my next cuppa tea (It’s important to get fluids in, right?!)

Urrgh. And a post about noise.

Caitlin — Thu, 23 Jul 2009 13:32:28 +0000

Well, today was the first day I haven’t actually felt WORSE than the day before. Yay?

For all that, it was still Another Bed Day. *sigh* And our solar hot water didn’t get installed yesterday because – THE PLUMBER WAS SICK! We’ve rescheduled for next Wednesday, just gotta hope that the weather doesn’t work against us.

Ricë wrote a post today about the intrusiveness of muzak. I started a rant in reply in my comment on her post, but here’s some more rant:

I’ve been rabbiting on at various In Real Life friends about the new growth industry (no, Dustin, it’s not PLASTICS) – it’s audiology. Seriously, every time I go to the shops there seems to be a new one offering hearing tests and ever smaller hearing aids. I think Toowoomba is up to about 20, for a population of 90,000. And do you know why?

I’LL TELL YOU WHY.

It’s because almost nobody can stand SILENCE any more. When and how did we become a culture that feels the need to be constantly immersed in man made sound? Waiting rooms are drenched in either overly loud muzak or blaring televisions. Supermarkets and shopping centres play their identifying jingles over and over and over. We get in cars and immediately turn on the radio or a CD. Those ubiquitous white dangly cords drape from ears to iPods, cocooning each wearer in their own world of individualised sound.

Our house is near the local railway yards, and surrounded by train tracks. We expect a certain amount of noise each day from the coal trains and maintenance vehicles, and most nights we can hear the chiropractic clunks and crashes of carriages being shunted. Some of the train drivers are artists, echoing the horn of their diesel engine around the valley as they pass by the yards.

On clear nights I can hear the “ping… Ping… Ping… pokpokpokpokpokpokpok” of the traffic signals over 150 metres away across the creek. Some nights we are visited by the local owl (mo POKE! mo POKE!) and some nights the plovers scream from the vacant, weedy blocks.

Some nights we are woken by domestic quarrels; by neighbours who think that chopping wood after midnight is a perfectly reasonable thing to do; by dog fights, screeching engines and tyres sliding on the bitumen. Or the ever-so-charming individual who believes that by renting a nearby industrial unit he has the right to super-amplified music at any time day or night. I don’t think in the 5 years I’ve lived here there has been a single night without hearing at least one set of emergency service vehicles dopplering by on one of the main roads.

Oh, and I mustn’t forget to mention Bung Lung – one of the new neighbours who, although appearing to be in his mid 20s, has the emphysemal lungs and bronchial function of a 50 a day pensioner. (We’ve started referring to their household as The Brueghels – because they’re phlegmish. (groan!) Nothing like hearing a lugey hawked up outside your window at 3am to jolt you out of a dream. (The cigarette stench is a subject for another post…)

All of those are noises which are beyond my control. When I can choose my audio surroundings, more often than not I’ll choose silence. Because it’s rare and I enjoy it. I have quite enough trouble fighting with my head to get anything done, without inviting more noise in.

I’ll listen to Radio National, if there’s something good on. My CD collection is almost exclusively female singers (loving the new Lily Allen album, and I never get tired of Kirsty MacColl)but I really only listen to music if I’m sewing or at the gym.

But Mr Beloved lives in a music centred world. Where I find it VERY difficult to process two audio signals at once (especially if one of them is voice), he thrives on audio complexity. (Not suprisingly, he’s a long time fan of Brian Eno.) I can’t read if there is competing audio – my brain just gets frustrated. My Dad can listen to radio, watch TV, AND read the newspaper all at once – I have no idea how he does it and even THINKING about it makes me feel quite ill.

My ideal world would have a soundproof room, possibly with squishy walls, and maybe a coat with arms long enough to actually fit me…

And now I’m off to take my medications. Night!

What day is it again?

Caitlin — Tue, 21 Jul 2009 05:54:16 +0000

[click to see bigger]

I’ve been dragging our old art supplies and starting to play with them again. I’m fighting against my inner critic to actually post anything here – be gentle and remember that it’s nicer to ask “Tell me about your art” than to say “Ummm – what is it?”

(Sometimes I have to “wreck” a page before I can get going. The background of this was one of those trainwrecks – luckily, a thin coat of gesso can make messes look better, or at least ot quite so hideously unworkable. This page was completely without a plan or goal, obviously.)

I have no idea why there is a clunky spaceman/repair-tech here or what he’s here to fix. Although if he could get rid of the bright yellow polka dots on my tonsils, I would be very grateful. Yep, Day 11 of the flu and I had the worst night yet last night – at one point I was coughing so hard that I thought I would break my back.

I have cabin fever. I haven’t left the house since last Tuesday when I went to the doctors. Mr Beloved is almost as sick as I am, but has managed to at least struggle out for milk and bread. And cuppa soups – normally I don’t like them but there’s only so much hot lemon/ginger/honey/hot water mix I can keep down…

Tomorrow (provided the weather stays fine) we’re getting the solar hot water system installed. Yay! It’s going to cost more to install than the actual gizmo (that would be the “evacuated tube collector“, Caity dear) and tank cost. Weird, huh?

I am sooooo looking forward to being able to have a hothothot bath all the way full – and with more hot water to top up! Of course it’s a super-rare luxury, and I will have to bucket all the water out to the garden once I’m done, but ooooh – sheer bloooody looxury!

Right – back to back issues of Cloth Paper Scissors and my hot water bottle…

No related posts.

snort (Also cough. And some moaning.)

Caitlin — Wed, 15 Jul 2009 00:24:02 +0000

From The Saturday Bulletin.

Meantime – I have flu. Swine flu? Who knows. The doctor said to keep doing what I’m doing (lots of fluids, bed rest, paracetamol, aspirin) and come back immediately if it gets worse.

Poor Mr Beloved is on his first day of the wretched virus now. Nothing to do but ride it out…

And we’re so faithful with getting our flu vacs super early – not fair when a whole new virus jumps out at ya, is it?!

Cough Hack WHEEEZE

Caitlin — Mon, 13 Jul 2009 11:54:30 +0000

Ugh. Have pretty much lost my voice. Hurts to cough – the pain goes right down my sternum and also right down my back. Off to Doctor’s tomorrow arvo. Not my usual (wonderful!) doc, but another in the same primary health care centre, so that’s ok.

It started with a sore throat on Friday, got to hurting on Saturday night, and yesterday and today I’ve mostly spent trying not to cough and swearing when I do, and sleeping. Very boring to do and even more boring to read about. Even more boring for the puir wee poodle, who sees it as her DUTY to stay by my bed. She won’t even eat until I’m up.

Tonight I’ve been catching up with a lot of blogs that I’d stopped reading – I’d kept them on my bloglines rss feeds, but just hadn’t had the energy to follow them. Very interesting to see the development of many of the Artful Quilters BlogRing. Some people who were just starting their adventures way back have become successful artists, some published authors.. and many have found other interests as well.
And I’ve been well looked after by Mr Beloved, Bringer of Cups Of Tea (also known as The Teabot 5000™) – ahhhh, so loved!

Another good activity when confined to bed is flicking through back issues of Cloth Paper Scissors and Quilting Arts magazines … gotta do something with my time after admitting that I needed to suspend my gym membership for the fortnight, since even if I’m not infectious I’m not about to go and hurl myself about! I’m getting inspired, starting to draw, and seriously considering some inchies as a way to get back to art quilting… and drawing and painting and collage too. Anyone wanna swap some inchies with me sometime?

Slide down the ladder….no wait, that’s not right!

Caitlin — Thu, 02 Jul 2009 12:45:11 +0000

Sometimes I like to think of my life as a giant game of snakes and ladders. No particular reason… but dentists definitely qualify as “snakes”, and they knock me back several squares every time.

Last week, I went to the dentist for my 6 month check up and clean. She found a CAVITY. *shudder*

So I made an appointment for Wednesday this week, and went home feeling pretty ok.

Until yesterday morning… when the tooth in question started feeling like it was about to explode. Owie. Didn’t help that my recurrent sinus infection was playing up…
A quick discussion before she starts on whether I should have white or amalgam fillings, The amalgam ones last twice as long as the less visible kind, so I opt for the metal, and she numbs me up. (Oooh boy was I numb! The appointment was at 2, it took ’til 7pm before I could feel the left side of my face properly!)

Drill, drill, whirr, whirrrrr grrrrrRRRRRRRiiiiinnd, drill drilll…
“OH.” She says. “The hole has spread to the adjoining surface. We might as well do that one today too, hmmm?”
“Mmmwrffgggl”, says the quivering wreck of Caity. (Did I mention that I’m not good at Dentists? No?! Well, I’m NOT. I didn’t go to the dentists for FIFTEEN YEARS and then I had to go every fortnight for most of a year. Hence the now religious 6 monthly appointments.)

(My Canberra Dentist, the wonderful Jo Newton, used to sing the Dentist’s Song from Little Shop of Horrors to me. She also had the Larson cartoon below next to the chair. I’m not sure if dentistry requires a certain sense of black humour to begin with or if you develop one as a result of spending your days looking at people’s teeth!)

I blame my dental phobias on childhood dental trauma (doesn’t everyone?) Imagine, if you will, that it is 1972, in a small town in rural New South Wales, and wee Caity is 4 years old. And there’s a GREAT BIG HULKING DENTIST with smoke stained fingers (this was waaaaaaay before gloves, let alone the anti-smoking movement!) like swollen sausages, trying to shove his fingers in my mouth. Without my permission. And then pulling out my teeth, because my teeth were too big for my mouth.

Oh shut up, I do so TOO have a small mouth.

Not Actually Me, But You Get The Idea

Then we skip through time (insert wavery dream sequence thingy here if you’re so inclined) to my early thirties, where my sins are starting to catch up with me. A series of root canals, another tooth pulled, (which is when I had my appointment times restricted to “Last of the day ONLY” so I didn’t scare off the other patients) and then The Big Mistake: getting my wisdom teeth out in the chair. If you ever have to get wisdom teeth out DO IT IN HOSPITAL. The Temperomandibular Joint Disorder (TMJ) problems from those 4 teeth lasted years. YEARS!!

Of course, I already had TMJ issues as a result of my first husband’s propensity to connect his fist rather solidly with my jaw whenever he got really drunk, and add the fact that I grind my teeth when I sleep … well, each visit to the dentist tends to leave me rather. bloody. miserable.

Finally I hear the best words possible: “You can Rinse out now”. YAY! I didn’t scream, not even once! (I also doubt I could recognise my dentist out of her rooms, sine I keep my eyes scrunched up for as much of the whole procedure as possible.) The Health Fund only paid about a third of the cost.

At least I didn’t grind my teeth last night – I know I didn’t because I didn’t sleep. My face still feels like I’ve been stomped on by a soccer player, and I’ve taken every combination of painkillers I’m allowed to have, up to and including Lindt 85% Cocoa chocolate. Think I’ll just head back to bed and moan some more for a while…

I hab a code id by node

Caitlin — Thu, 18 Jun 2009 10:55:30 +0000

So logically I KNOW that this:

is not really related to the fact that I hab a code id by node. Really. But going out to take pictures of the half inch thick ice from the wheelbarrow probably wasn’t the smartest thing to do.

Lots of bed time this week!

Total (lack of) Recall

Caitlin — Wed, 27 May 2009 11:15:59 +0000

My memory is going. Or rather, parts of it have already gone. Anyone who knows me In Real Life will have already noticed the phenomenon – and I suspect, Dear Reader, I may have bored you with the same story more than once, too. But I can’t remember.

My long term memory still seems to be mostly okay. My short term memory is… ummm, what was I saying again? And I feel like the transition between short term and long term memory just isn’t happening very effectively.

I don’t know if the loss is due to general anaesthetics (four in one year is NOT a good thing) – I asked my darling SIL (a super smart nurse, now cardio sonographer and probably going back for yet more study) about it and she said there is certainly a lot of anecdotal evidence for the link, but hadn’t read any peer reviewed studies about it.

(I also have to fight any tendency to think “Well this is it, the brain tumor”…. because there is NO evidence that my sister’s illness and death were caused by anything but a random rogue cell gone berserk. Still, I worry…)

Of course, there’s always the “major depressive disorder” diagnosis to account for memory loss as well.

Internet induced hypochondria is always a fun game to play. I love this list of “some of the earliest signs and symptoms of Alzheimer’s disease” from the Mayo Clinic: (My typical responses in this funny green colour)

Asking the same questions repeatedly (What are we having for dinner? Was there any mail today? Did you go to the shops already?)
Difficulty remembering common words when speaking (You KNOW, the WHOSAMATHINGER!! The WHATSIT!! THE DOOVERLACKEY!! Damnit, what’s it called? Oh yeah – the CAR.)
Mixing words up — saying “bed” instead of “table,” for example (I’ll just put this on the trouser, then, shall I? And mop the kitchen …. thingummyjig.)
Being unable to complete familiar tasks, such as following a recipe (Muffins need FLOUR? Oops!)
Misplacing items in inappropriate places, such as putting a wallet in the refrigerator (Isn’t that the first place everyone looks?)
Getting lost while driving on familiar streets (La la la I’m sticking my fingers in my ears, I only had to drive around the big block once…)
Undergoing sudden changes in mood or behavior for no apparent reason (I’M NOT GRUMPY! Oh. Is there any tea left in the pot then?“)
Becoming less able to follow directions (“No, truly, the sewing pattern companies JUST DON’T MAKE SENSE. And I’ve ALWAYS been left/right dyslexic. That’s not new. Hang on, this says do WHAT?)

I finally – FINALLY!! After months of trying to remember – got a friend’s surname last night at about 2 am. The annoying thing was that his surname is also his nickname (as is the way with many Aussie nicknames – shorten and add an “ee” or an “oh”) and it was just… GONE from my memory. I could see his face, hear his voice, remember his first name – but the surname? Nope. I even sent an email to my Mum back on April 14: “What was the surname of S, that Nif used to share a house with?” – and that was a last resort, after wracking my brain for weeks. ARRRGH!! (she didn’t know either. But I’ve stayed at his house, had him stay at mine, written letters back and forth, etc!)

I recently bought a book that we already owned – a Bad Thing when our book buying is so limited – because I didn’t remember it AT ALL. And I used to be the one that people were awed by, since I could remember whole slabs of reading. I could cite names and arguments for academic debates and essays. Now I get to re-read books over and over – because the plots and characters disappear between one reading and the next

There are patterns and fabrics in my sewing stash that I have absolutely no recall of buying.

And I often get things wrong because I JUST DON’T REMEMBER. And sometimes my mind tries to fill in the blanks anyway – which means that sometimes my version of events is significantly different from what others remember. I know that happens anyway – no one’s perception of events is the same as anyone else’s, right? I mean, we can’t even be sure that we’re all seeing the same colour when we label something as “red”. Let alone more subjective and emotionally coloured experiences.

Old age? Sleep deprivation? Drug interaction? Just plain getting DUMBER? I don’t know.

Or maybe I just don’t remember. Am I alone in all this? And why am I writing this anyway? Who are you, I’ve never seen you before in my life!!